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Election for the new President
of India is going to take
place in a few months and
political parties are busy
identifying suitable candidate
for the post. Opposition parties,
mainly NDA, are sensing
an opportunity to outsmart
the ruling coalition by fielding
a strong candidate. So the
opposition parties called a
meeting of all likeminded parties
to arrive at a consensus
candidate for the post of
President. Leading opposition
leaders gathered at a
resort in a hill station and the
meeting went on like this:
The first person to get the
offer was Chandrababu
Naidu of Telugu Desam
Party. Even communist parties
supported the move saying,
"Actually, he was the
consensus candidate for the
post of Prime Minister when
the third front formed government
in 90s." But Naidu was
not interested, "I want to
serve the people of Andhra
for some more time," he reasoned.
"But people of Andhra
have voted you out twice
already," somebody from
TRS taunted. "So what?
There is nothing wrong in giving
a try third time," said a
diehard supporter of Telugu
Desam Party.
Suddenly, one person got
up folding his white dhoti, "I
recommend Amma, Selvi
Puratchi Thalaivi, Ithaya
Deivam…" Interrupting him,
a single member party from
Kerala said, "OK, oK, I got it,
you are recommending
Kumari Jayalalithaa." "We
are OK with that," said the
other parties. But the Lighthouse
of Peninsular India
was not comfortable, "I am
still in my early sixties and
too young to become President,"
she said. "Age is no
bar; after all, age can be
changed too. UPA has
changed the age of the army
chief," said Akali Dal member.
"No, I have a few more
years of politics left in me
and have no plans to retire
from politics in near future."
This turned the attention on
veteran Lal Krishna Advani.
"Why can't you give it a try,
sir?" said Nitin Gadkari, hesitatingly.
"No, no. I plan to conduct
at least two more Yatras
before I call it a day." "That's
all the more reason you
should become President.
Once you become President,
all your Yatra expenses will
be borne by the government.
Look, the present President
undertook 12 videsh yatras
costing the exchequer `205
crore, all at governmnent's
expense," suggested Sushma
Swaraj. "I am not talking
about videsh yatras. I am talking
about Rat Yatras," said
the slightly upset Advaniji.
With that he poured cold
water on the aspirations of
many PM aspirants in NDA.
"Why can't we try Sharad
Pawar?" Somebody from the
corner suggested. Confused
opposition members found
some merit in the suggestion.
Immediately they contacted
Pawar who was watching IPL-
5 and put forth the offer. Taken
aback by this offer, Pawar
retorted, "How is this possible?
I am part of UPAand how can I
become your candidate?"
"That's not a problem at all.
You were always our well
wisher during all elections—
general elections, state elections
and even local body
elections," somebody from
BJP reminded him. "But I
can't give up the ICC chief's
post until Sachin retires," putting
the ball back in the opposition's
court.
Now the opposition parties
are left with the even more
onerous task of convincing
Sachin to retire from cricket!
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